top of page

The Spritzler Report
Search
snitzoid
4 minutes ago0 min read
The Baby Bust Is Forcing a Reckoning at Public Schools
I asked Claude to analyse the map below: Blue states (TX, FL, the Carolinas, TN, ID, UT, the Dakotas): in-migration of young families outweighs falling fertility. Florida stands out because it stayed blue despite large school-choice programs that pull students out of public enrollment. Dark brown, coastal and Northeast (CA, OR, NY, New England, IL): low fertility, high housing costs and family out-migration all push the same direction. The article’s Methuen example names both
snitzoid
9 minutes ago5 min read
Snitz mansplains whats the story with religion lately.
It may be stable but kids aren't really practicing religion like before 2020. I blame drugs, sex and rock music. Hey wait a minute! Kids are drinking less, use fewer drugs and listen to Taylor Swift. I've just put my finger on the problem! Religion Remains Stable in the U.S., With Mixed Signals for Young Adults A closer look at recent religious trends in the United States By Gregory A. Smith, Chip Rotolo and Alan Cooperman, Pew Research After a prolonged decline, religion in
snitzoid
10 hours ago3 min read
What do people think about that ICE thing?
Talk about stealing defeat from the jaws of victory. All Voldemort had to do is take the win. He'd stablized our border and simply had to arrest illegals who commited violent/property crimes. But he engaged in what we at the Report like to call "overeach". By the way that's a copywrited term. Capeche? Americans’ Views of ICE Grow More Negative ByAndy Cerda, Pew Research Oct 26.2026 A majority of Americans (56%) now say they have an unfavorable opinion of Immigration and Cu
snitzoid
10 hours ago2 min read
Bill Belichick, 74, and Jordon Hudson, 25, secretly split?
Call me a dreamer, perhaps an optomist. Is it wrong to hope an honest guy can find love with a woman one third his age. Sure she has large breasts. I say so what! This is a sad day for the Spritzler Report. I wish them both happiness in their continued endevours apart. Bill Belichick, 74, and Jordon Hudson, 25, secretly split late last year — months before loved-up appearance in May: report By Carson Blackwelder, NY Post Published Oct. 30, 2026, 7:14 p.m. ET It’s reportedly
snitzoid
18 hours ago3 min read
Ilhan Omar’s allies break ranks as ex-Dem insider says sham marriage allegations are ‘almost certainly true’
OMG, you commit some alleged Medicare fraud (the operative word is alleged) and right away they malign you simply because you married a family member. Last time I checked it's not illegal to marry your brother. Oh it is? I didn't know that. Never mind! Ilhan Omar’s allies break ranks as ex-Dem insider says sham marriage allegations are ‘almost certainly true’ By Ally Goelz, NY Post Published Oct. 30, 2026, 3:04 p.m. ET A prominent Minnesota Democrat is breaking ranks with h
snitzoid
23 hours ago4 min read
snitzoid
23 hours ago0 min read
The other Spritzler is a plant by the Democratic Party
That other guy promoting the "Spritzler Chronicle" is a left learning DSA journalist funded by George Soros. Don't read that garbage. BTW he lives in a double wide trailer outside of Albany, NY. Alaska’s Election System Blunts Political Gamesmanship Ross Sherman, Unite America September 8, 2026 Two candidates named Dan Sullivan will appear on the November general election ballot for Alaska’s U.S. Senate race, prompting critics to blame the state’s top-four election system. Th
snitzoid
1 day ago3 min read
Jenny McCarthy Living in a Tent After ‘Traumatic’ Mold Poisoning, Feels ‘Crazy’ and
I consulted Claude on this. I want to make it clear that the AI Chatbot is not saying the reality TV Star and former anti vaccine spokesperson is batshit crazy. She still easy on the eyes and I do not judge. Oh wait...I just did by commenting on her appearance. Sorry...my bad. Her suffering sounds real, but the diagnosis and treatment she’s describing sit well outside mainstream medicine, and the tent is the clearest sign of that. What she’s reported. She says she’s sleepin
snitzoid
1 day ago4 min read
Neighbors Feud Over Frontyard Horror Shows as Halloween Keeps Getting Scarier
OMG, the Spritzler Report Chainsaw Guy is literally flying off the shelfs at Wallmart and there's always some Karen complaining to the local authorities. Tell the kids to put on their Big Boy pants and grow a pair. The same goes for the girls. Neighbors Feud Over Frontyard Horror Shows as Halloween Keeps Getting Scarier Parents are pushing back against displays of decapitated bodies and severed pig heads they say are terrorizing children; ‘I’m scared to walk by—and I’m an ad
snitzoid
1 day ago4 min read
Wartime means boom times for Big Oil in America
First off, the rumor that I somehow profited by investing half my net worth in big oil prior to the war breaking out is categorically untrue. I do not profit from other's misfortunes (unless absolutely necessary). I have been using Claude to track my earnings however. Wartime means boom times for Big Oil in America ExxonMobil and Chevron saw record quarterly earnings as they pushed to turn out more diesel and U.S. prices for the fuel reached all-time highs By Cris Tolomia, Q
snitzoid
1 day ago2 min read
Hochul just confessed: She’ll give Mamdani his tax hikes next year
I love the Big Apple. Meaning I'm happy to be living elsewhere. Oh, wait a minute. I'm in a suburb of Chicago. Never mind. Hochul just confessed: She’ll give Mamdani his tax hikes next year By Post Editorial Board Published Oct. 30, 2026, 5:30 a.m. ET Gov. Kathy Hochul’s artful dodge on the issue tells you all you need to know: She’s going to give Mayor Zohran Mamdani at least some of his tax hikes — next year, once she’s safely re-elected. This year, she sent him some stat
snitzoid
1 day ago2 min read
Companies are in bidding wars to hire software engineers.
I fired up Claude to evaluate why tech is laying off programmers but at the same time hiring software engineers? WTF? I've heard many tech companies and the Mag 7 are laying off workers. Plus many computer programmers are losing their jobs? Examine the attached story and evaluate why the demand is up for software engineers. Why are there fortunes so different. Am I missing something? You’re not wrong. Both things are true at once, and the article only shows half of the pictur
snitzoid
1 day ago5 min read
Gallup polling: Where people sit on election the parties, politicians?
Me? I blame Voldemort for high prices, not Joe. Plus I'd like to leave Iran and trust they'll be fair about letting oil flow (& using the bomb). I think it's time we turned to a socialist to run the show, like they have over in France. That seems to be working out fairly well. Oct. 30, 2026 Welcome to Front Page, Gallup's indispensable intelligence distilled into five charts that give leaders the insights they need to make their most important decisions. Record Lows Say In
snitzoid
1 day ago3 min read
snitzoid
2 days ago0 min read
Pilot Says A Dog Peed On The Plane—Passengers Vote On Cleaning It Or Departing On Time
I'm outraged. This pseudo journalist didn't even both to report the outcome. I'd never publish this type of dribble. I tried to put Claude on this. Still feeling uneasy. Leff’s “veil of ignorance” point is the sharpest part of the piece, but I think it cuts against the vote more than for it. Not knowing where the spot is only helps until people board and start sniffing. After that, the person in 23C is stuck with an outcome everyone else chose at no cost to themselves. Equ
snitzoid
2 days ago4 min read
Zeihan thinks Voldemort's tweet on data centers is good?
Some great commentary. One elephant in the room. Data centers will drive economic development. States that allow them will attract new residents, capital and jobs. The data center is like fly paper attracting bugs.
snitzoid
2 days ago1 min read
After a blue wave does Voldemort become a lame duck?
The Dark Lord will keep throwing grenades and landing them with or without his party. Most notably Iran. Donald Trump will never be a lame duck Freddy Gray, The Spectator Oct 29, 2026 Of all the rotten clichés in American political discourse, “lame duck presidency” is arguably the worst. It ought to be dragged out back – perhaps by the former homeland security secretary and infamous animal-slayer Kristi Noem – and strangled to death. Yet commentators have to say something abo
snitzoid
2 days ago5 min read
Bill Maher: It's the old farts?
Bill's 100% right. The solution? The government supporting policies that support business growth. An alternative that that? Err...I can't think of any, unless you want the government to print money (called inflation).
snitzoid
2 days ago1 min read
How to stop a ‘what if’ anxiety spiral before it takes over
I have a large framed picture of Alfred E Neuman hung directly over my computer screen. How to stop a ‘what if’ anxiety spiral before it takes over A psychologist shares four ways to interrupt worst-case thinking and feel less overwhelmed. October 28, 2026 By Anna Borges, Washington Post You may know the spiral well: It starts off as a single worry, such as how tonight’s date will go, whether you made a mistake at work or what an abnormal medical test result means. Then it ta
snitzoid
2 days ago6 min read
Contact
bottom of page